Do we ever really know what we want to do? I mean… most people I know seem to have it all figured out. But do they really? Are they happy? If they died tomorrow would they feel like they LIVED?
I’m surrounded by middle class, cookie cutter lives. Where the typical pattern is: to get married at 26, buy a house, have a kid at 28, followed by another two years later. Work 9 to 5 in a standard job with not much creativity but… it provides financial security. Sit in peak hour traffic for an hour every day just to get home, cook dinner and watch TV. Really… Are they happy? Is that how they imagined their lives would turn out?
I just found out that someone I met on my travels in the middle of 2014 is about to die. She literally has hours left. Life is so short and can be snatched. Just. Like. That. It’s such a weird feeling. At this age to think you could be dead within 2 years is ridiculous. But you know what…. you could be dead tomorrow. I really admire the way she lived and I’m pretty certain that even if she’d known she had less than 2 years to live before cancer took her, she would have made the same choices.
“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts and we are never, ever the same” Flavia. Jess* we only knew each briefly but your vivaciousness, enthusiasm, carpe diem attitude, generous heart and CRAZY spirit made an impression on me. My life was better for meeting you as we created some awesome memories. And the world was better off with you in it.
We don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our paths for a reason. unknown
We don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our paths for a reason. And your imminent death has got me doing some serious thinking about how life can be taken so quickly. How it can just finish so rudely and unexpected. It makes me think what do I want to do with mine? And how to make the most of it?
So, I’ve decided to extend my planned 6 week holiday into a 6 month adventure! Some serious soul searching and me time is on the cards to figure out what I want my life to look like. Not all those who wander are lost. That’s true. But in all honesty I’m feeling a bit off-track. It’s all very Eat, Pray, Love. I don’t exactly know where I’m going to travel during this time but one place I will go is Finisterre, Spain. Just for you. I know you also walked the Camino Frances and were adventurous enough to walk on after Santiago to the end of the earth. The Camino Frances was one of the second things we talked about. Straight after “double bagging” FFS!. Anyhow, when I get to the “former” end of the earth I will think of you and giggle at the memory of you showing me around the world via pics of sexy, very naked, foreign men on your phone. Oh my, there were so many. And you know what. Good on you! Good on you for making the most of your too short but eventful life!
I don’t know what I want to do with my life but I know it’s not the “cookie cutter”. Your impending death has made me realise I need to figure it out. I know where I don’t want to live. But I don’t know where I want to live. I know who I want to be with but I don’t know how to get there. I know I want to do something extraordinary with my life. But I don’t know what that looks like. I do know that I want to be adventurous and confident and blaze my own trail like you did. You are/were a f*cking legend!
Thank you for being, thank you for the memories travel buddy. Keep walking…
*Name has been changed.